WIGS, wigs, wigs- The laughing may begin!

Sorry the pictures are wonky... SO the Monday after radiation was finished (January 21) my hair started falling out in clumps.  Wednesday, had it all shaved off and headed to the American Cancer Society to pick out a wig. I must say I do enjoy scarves and hats this most as they are comfortable. Yet, I felt I needed one hair wig. I also wound up with two sets of "bangs" to wear with hats and scarves.  I must admit God really got me with this hair loss.  At the beginning when I was diagnosed I was ready to lose my hair.  My Oncologist gave me a hard time saying "Here your father and I are just trying to hold on to the hair we have. You just want to cut your all off."  I must admit that I feel most self conscience with being so bloated on medication and radiation. I'm sure there will be plenty of pictures of me all bloated but, I am soon get to wean off it. YEA! Unfortunately, I was bloated in Florida. Just means I mean I have to go back.  I give you the wigs I tried on...HILARIOUS

Like Coca~Cola says~ ENJOY!!

This one is totally my favorite!

Or maybe this one...

This one is ok.

Look I'm a Golden Girl!

Melissa McCarthy?

And the winner!!!

Ring, ring, ring goes the bell!

Hopefully, this will be the last time you see my face like this. Probably not!  Anyhow, I'm going to be brave and show you my "Moon Face."  Yes, I'm self coincence about it.  I waited until 8 days into my radiation to treatment look into the mirror. Why? I'm not sure. But what I found, was, well, my face was "gone."  This probably will not be the last time you see my face like this, *sigh,*  yet a gal can hope right? When, you finish your radiation treatment, they have you "Ring the bell."
So here it is, I give you the full series of: "Ring, Ring, Ring goes the Bell."

Wow...it's been awhile

I haven't posted a blog since the day after my birthday.  Quite a bit has happened since then.
I wanted to take a moment to reflect on what the past year has consisted of:

3- "girl surgeries" the last ridding of my baby room. I also had the unfortunate opportunity to experience a nasal gastric tube. SO UNPLEASANT
Then wound up with pneumonia again to find out my lung cancer had yet returned. Followed by horrible, terrible, headaches in which I found out that I had a tumor strangling my pituitary gland.  This was also around the time I had a bad mix of medication and surely amused the floor nurses.  Though the show of the medical hallucinations was kick @$$ for the most part. They were surely something I did NOT want to deal with the whole time.  The medical staff also had a bit of a hard time convincing me they were not reality.  To the point where they point an alarm around my bed. HA!
They used the Gamma Knife to kill the tumor around my pituitary gland.  They only got to use 30% of power they planned as the tumor was too close to the coaxis of my optical nerves and didn't want to risk my sight. Thank Jesus it worked and the tumor today is still dormant. I am on meds since the gland is still blocked, dormant tumor-YEA!
In September, they thought I had a "drop tumor" in my spine and I came close to having my first radiation.  11 AM the day of the doctors office called in and said not to come.  They wound up finding out that it was a benign tumor after surgically removing it.  I have a beautiful 4 inch scar on my lower back.
So, last I left off, I think, is the spinal tap. Which I didn't have a horrible time with, but as you probably read they found cancer in my beautifully clear spinal fluid.  This resulted in them inserting the port in my brain. 
The day before Thanksgiving, I had the port (omaya) put into my head. They released me on Thanksgiving day. Unfortunately, I was back in the hospital that evening vomiting.
In December, I've had 6 chemo sessions. One and three were horrible.  The only way I know how to describe them are what it would like to be in hell.  It was 2-3 hours of burning up and sweating through my clothes. The medical staff did their best to ice me down.  Then, I was freezing cold. My body just emptied out afterwards.  I was pretty exhausted after. They always remove as much brain juice as they put in chemo.  (They can only tell if the fluid is cancerous, not how much cancer there is. Weird, huh?) The secret way to keep everything in check for me was to me at a 45 degree angle. Also they have to remove and insert the injections one cc per minute....a.k.a. super slow. 
 I wound up in the hospital with uncontrollable vomiting the week before Christmas.  I had a low grade fever. They were very concerned that I had some sort of infection, which they never did figure out but the vomiting did stop. I was released December 21. I had a great Christmas with my family and wound up with three weeks off treatment which was quite nice.

With the New Year, new treatment:
Tomorrow, I begin my first brain radiation treatment.  I will have this five days a week for two weeks.  I asked my oncologist the side effects. I think he wanted to avoid my excitement or expectation over the possible loss of my hair. He has minimal hair himself and has been heckling me from the beginning. I just look as it as part of the experience.  The Radiologist doctor said there is a good chance, I will lose my hair. My Oncologist is also planning on changing my chemotherapy for my lung, after radiation.  When, asked again, about the side effects he said we would talk about it later...hmmmm

Anyhow, I want to leave you with this song. It's a favorite of mine from my beloved Anchor Fellowship in Nashville, TN.  I love that place, I long to visit soon!

SPINAL TAP!

The other day I had a spinal tap.  Pretty bad ass I know! As you know my life tends to be pretty scary. I don't need to bungee jump or sky dive ( though sky diving at this point sounds pretty fun and a tattoo.)  Life is my challenge. It amazes what is going on in my body, yet, I can still manage to walk and live.
Anyhow,  Wednesday I am taking one more step into cyborgdom and getting a ommaya. Here is how they put it in if you are interested: How to become more of a robot
Why am I mentioning ommaya? In the spinal tap they found cancer cells.  These have metastasized from my lung cancer. I will be receiving chemo in this port twice a week. They will be testing each time for cancer cell.  Crazy news the week of your birthday, right?
So, now I'm just wondering when I will turn into "Small Wonder."

Her dress, ROCKS! I mean I could totally pull that off at my age right?? I mean I should have a license to wear what I wanna. I have earned the right! Then, once I beat this, you can ask me what I'm doing and I will reply, " I'm going to Disneyland....and Sea World!!"
I'll be going home to rest. Spinal Taps make your bones achy and tired.  I'm bummed I can't be in Nashville but believe you me I'm always there in spirit. Besides I don't think I would be much fun.

When is my vacation from Cancer?

As you can probably tell, no trip to California, yet. My last blog was in September. In October, I was back at the Neurologist. My favorite place to be called into after a PET scan.  They found a spot on my lower spine. At first they sent me in for radiation. I had been been marked to start treatment. I was called the next day. The day radiation was supposed to begin and they cancelled!  The tumor board had met AGAIN and decided that this lesion (what they thought was what they call a "drop lesion") was not related to my lung cancer or the tumor on my pituitary gland.  This was something that would only get bigger and bigger. It had already caused me to lose my footing and fall.  Among other things...scary I tell you.
Anyhow, on October 12, I went into the surgery.  They removed the tumor on my spinal cord and behind was left a 6 inch scar. The good news is it was BENIGN!  Thank the Lord for that! I no longer have the side effects I did. I still haven't gained my strength back. However, I have definitely slowly started to gain my strength. All in due time.
It's hard to believe it's already November.
It looks like I may get to come to FINALLY visit. My parents asked what I wanted for my birthday. I said,"Visit my beloved Nashville,please?"  So, pending my usual issues i may be in the weekend AFTER my birthday, November 15. This is also when Lungevity is having their walk/5K run. I'm hoping my mobility scooter and I will be attending. 
NASHVILLE FRIENDS:
Lungevity is having another walk this year on November 17. If you are interested in walking, go to this link Lungevity. Please join my team Badger Believers, if you wanna!
It's 2 days AFTER my birthday day this year. It's during Lung Cancer awareness month.
I hope to see my Nashville friends while down there. I'm not a great planner and I would love to see you while I'm there so please drop me a line if you have any ideas of where we could meet up. You can think of it at your gift to me :)
Much Love!
K*

it's not easy being an anomaly.....

Well, first of all I would like to take a moment to remember the Great Muppeteer that passed of emphysema on August 23, 2012. You may remember him best as Count von Count on Sesame Street. He was also Gobo Fraggle, Amazing Mumford, and many more! Thank you Jerry Nelson, for teaching us all how to Count...ah ah ah!  Another soul taken by a horrible lung disease...BOO HISS!

Anyhow, in Kristi Badger news...well it's not the greatest. On the good side, my right lung and brain tumor are dormant. As of September 13, I have moved into maintenance Chemo for my lung issues. The tumor on my pituitary gland was taken care of with the gamma knife they did back in May...yea.

NASHVILLE FRIENDS:

Lungevity is having another walk this year on November 17. If you are interested in walking, go to this link Lungevity
It's 2 days AFTER my birthday day this year. Also it's during Lung Cancer awareness month.

 However, along the way I have developed a tumor in my lower back. It was found in my last PET scan. Then last week I had an MRI done. The tumor board is still trying to decide what kind of lesion it is. I almost started radiation this week when they called and cancelled. The board is trying to decide whether it's removable or whether it just needs radiation. Regardless of it all... very scary and frustrating. I'm trying not to think about and do all I can to rest in him...it's all I know how to do at this point.

I was hoping to take a vacation from cancer next month...and if those Ellen tickets pull through I WILL find a way. I WILL!!

Peace to you my Lovelies who keep me up in Prayer and Love!

K*

Exciting week, AHOY!!

I hope everyone is doing well! This week I am having quite a few tests done. In fact, I'm finally getting results that I have been waiting THREE months for.  That's right, we finally get to see what the Gamma Knife did inside my head. So, here is how the schedule goes:

Monday: PET Scan 

Thursday: MRI then appt with the Brain Doc to see what all the Gamma Knife treatment did

Friday: Bloodwork, Visit with Dr MO to see the results of the PET Scan and to see what kind of chemo I will be receiving on Friday...full blown or maintenance!

I'm exhausted just thinking about the upcoming week.

Since November (Lung Cancer Month) is quickly approaching, I thought I would share some facts from Lung Cancer Leaders

WOMEN AND LUNG CANCER

Lung cancer will take the lives of 71,000 women this year – more deaths than from 

breast, ovarian, and uterine cancers combined - yet cancer’s #1 killer of women remains 

greatly overlooked and misunderstood. Here are some of the essential facts about women 

and lung cancer:

*Lung cancer kills more women each year than breast, uterine and ovarian cancers 

combined.

*93% misidentified the leading cancer killer of women or have no idea what it is.

*Lung cancer will kill 71,000 women this year, nearly 80% more than will die 

from breast cancer

*Only 8% of women know lung cancer is the leading cancer killer of women (49% 

think breast cancer is)

*One in every 16 women will develop lung cancer in her lifetime

*Lung cancer diagnoses among women are up six fold over the last 30 years

*One in five women diagnosed with lung cancer never smoked

*Approximately 20,000-25,000 people who have never smoked are diagnosed with 

lung cancer in the U.S. each year; more than 60 percent are women

* As a separate disease category, lung cancer deaths in never-smokers ranks as the 

seventh deadliest cancer worldwide

*The overall 5 year survival rate for women with lung cancer lags far behind those 

of other women’s cancers (Lung cancer: 18.8%, Breast cancer: 90.1%, Ovarian 

cancer: 45.6%, Uterine cancer: 81.1%, Cervical cancer: 71.8%)

*Lung cancer receives $1,249 of federal funding per death, while breast cancer 

receives $27,480 per death, followed by $14,336 for prostate cancer and $6,590

for colon cancer

*Lung cancer surpassed breast cancer as the #1 cancer killer of women in 1987

References:

Cancer Facts and Figures 2011, American Cancer Society. 

http://www.cancer.org/acs/groups/content/@epidemiologysurveilance/documents/document/acspc-

029771.pdf Accessed October 2011.

Hyams and Johnson. Out of the Shadows: Woman and Lung Cancer. Brigham and Women’s Hospital. 

2010.

Out of the Shadows: Women and Lung Cancer, Lung Cancer Alliance. 

http://www.lungcanceralliance.org/shadows/Women_and_LC_2010.pdf Accessed September 2011.

The Desperate Need for Lung Cancer Funding. Uniting Against Lung Cancer.

http://www.unitingagainstlungcancer.org/research/need. Accessed October 2011.

GfK Roper Public Affairs national survey, conducted Oct 7-9, 2011. 

http://www.vshift.com/images/vshift/assets/File/LLCFW_Survey_Press_Release.pdf

Remember Cancer isn't always pink!

I will be sure to let you all know what I find out!  

Thanks for all your love and support! It makes my heart shine!

Love!

K*

Where did time go?

    I didn't realize I hadn't blogged since APRIL!  So, in case your wondering, yes, I am indeed still alive and kickin'.  I've had a few procedures and a couple of hospital stays since.  I've been out of the Hospital probably since May 7th.
    Along with being told, that the lung cancer had returned and having pneumonia. I entered the hospital having horrible headaches. And as you may or may not have seen in my last blog, this was because of a tumor on my pituitary gland in my brain.  It took awhile for them to get my medication correct.  I also wound up breaking my power port, so I had that replaced. Luckily, it had not shattered and dispersed through my body. I also had another bronchoscopy.  I had to be OUT of the hospital to have the Gamma Knife Radiation treatment (otherwise the insurance would not cover it.) That was a bit of an emotional procedure because they discovered in the MRI before hand the the tumor is way to close to where my optic nerves cross. They had to be very careful when going in to radiate the tumor.  The results of this procedure take up to 3 months to see take affect.  I'm also back to full chemo. My next treatment is 7/13.
    The brain tumor has left me wearing sunglasses ALOT.  My balance is also way off. 
     In happier news, I am now been blessed with some items I've been wanting to make my life a little easier.  Now, as soon as I'm well enough, I can travel the skies again. I have a portable oxygen concentrator! Since the cancer returning, I'm back on oxygen full time. I also got approved to have my insurance cover a power scooter! I am very blessed with an awesome nurse at my insurance who helps get things done. I should have my scooter this upcoming week.  My adult stroller can be a pain in the butt. Especially when you have to tell people where to go and you feel like you are yelling just so they can hear where you would like to go.  

I'm Blinding you with Science!!!

Here is my life:
March 2011 I was told it was my Allergies.  Then I was told I had one impressing case of pneumonia I Almost one year ago (April 29) I was told I had lung cancer.
So, here it is almost one year later,
*I have pneumonia.
*I have been to Urgent Care 2 or 3 times.
*I had migraine head aches.
*I had a PET scan on Friday, April 13. (bum, bum, bum)
* I was admitting to the hospital Monday,  April 16.
* I have had two MRIs, YUCK!!!!
* Come to find out I have malignant tumor that jumped up from my lung to surround my pituitary gland.                       This is why I had the migraines. The tumor is blocking my hormones from doing their job. So, for the time being I'm having replacement therapy.
* With this I also found out that the Lung cancer is back and is also in my lymph nodes.
* Did you  know that is it is very rare that lung cancer would go to your pituitary gland..
* I'm having a bronchoscopy-TOMORROW!  This will check out the extent of the lung cancer.
*Next week, I will have radiation for the first time on my pituitary gland. 
*Soon we we find out when I go back to chemotherapy.


It should be interesting to see what they find come tomorrow. Just when you think that insane thing called cancer will blow you mind once in your life...KA POW!!!  There it goes again.  


Yet, all I can think is that God loves me and I am in his hands.  I'm pretty sure my purpose in life is to teach doctors all about anomalies. 


Todays songs are: I had to use this one. I love some "The new Mickey Mouse Club" 

Much Love and Peace to you all!
 K*

I don't believe it-Big News!

So, last we left off I still had my baby room.  Here is what has happened since.  My head is still spinning from it all!
My parents, my bro-in-law, my nieces and I went to Hermitage, TN to begin to gather the contents of my house to put into storage.  We got to stop in Huntington to see the Beau-Po  duo.  They joined us on our journey to Hillbilly Hotdog . If you ever go, it's only worthwhile to go to LaSage. Trust me. I did my best to make it a great food tour too. We also stopped in Bowling Green, Kentucky at Culvers. This is a chain out of Wisconsin.   When we first arrived, we took care of getting my car up and running.  After my dad drove it coasting into Advance Auto parts.  Glad I had him to drive it there!  It turned out that it only needed a new battery! We then went to Walmart to get my oil changed.  That went swimmingly until those pesky tornado sirens started to blow.  My nieces didn't like that at all. I didn't like being in Wal-Mart anyways, let alone crushed into the area formerly known as lay-a-way.  The tornado blew over and we were on our merry way. We crashed in Mt Juliet. My nieces really enjoyed the indoor pool! We enjoyed some Red Robin (YUM) for dinner.  None of us had burgers though...weird.
Saturday, I was blessed with SOO many helpers. I also got to see some of my favorite neighbors.  There was a great deal of help from my church home The Anchor Fellowship. I also got to see 4 co-workers and friends from Kroll. It was amazing how much we got done.  However, for me it was quite overwhelming. I could only be in one place at a time.  I got a little sick of being "Kristi" that day.  It was quite a chorus :) It still weirds me out that I still don't know what is where. We then headed to my favorite Asian buffet, KOI. Buffalo Wild Wings was our dinner destination.
Even though we didn't have enough room for everything, I am glad that I will get to come back and get the rest of my belongings. I look forward to another trip to Nashville and getting to see more of my friends.  Sunday, my bro-in-law and nieces headed home.  My parents and I went to church. It always feels like home. I'm always glad to  see my Anchor family and can't wait to go back!
After church, we headed to Calypso. YUM! I  love that darn house salad dressing.  We then went to meet my "Fairy God Mother." She has been watching my dogs since May.  She was bringing my dog Ava for us to take home.  After a long hard decision, I decided it would be best for Misha to find a new home.  Our Fairy God Mother has agreed to take care of her for as long as needed, if not forever.  Misha  really loves it there. She even has her eye on a boy pup.  His name is Carlton and he is a biter.  Don't worry though he is on prozac!  She even has playdates scheduled! As much as it saddened me to make this decision, I know it is the right decision. As a person who has volunteered and fostered dogs I felt bad. However, I know Misha wouldn't be the dog she is without Ivory, Ava and I. I am so proud of her. I originally took her in because she was a mill rescue and would not leave her "house." She was such a mess and would have been very difficult to get adopted at that time. Now she is a REAL dog.
You are probably wondering where Ivory was.  She stayed with a close family friends.  They have two rat terriers, Rufus and Ella.  She was kinda a hussy while there. She slept with 3 different people.  She is a sweet girl!  
My Mom went to pick Ivory up while I was napping.  Ava was laying on my lap.  The reaction was the opposite of what I thought it would be. Ava growled at Ivory. Ivory said her hellos properly and then so did Ava.  Today, I even caught them laying in the recliner together!  Aw, my baby girls.
Now onto the medical news....
Wednesday, I went to the dr to get the results of my last procedure.  The doctor told me that everything inside looked fine. This was including my organs around my uterus.  He said there were fibroids but they looked normal. The washes inside also were normal.  However, my mom and I questioned the ones found in the walls on my ultrasound. He said the report could have been wrong.  He suggested that he could remove the fibroids. To which I kept questioning, why is it glowing on a PET scan.  I asked if he had talked to my Oncologist. He said he would. (I thought he would have before this appointment.)  The doctor seemed like he couldn't grasp the concept of why I would want it removed as he kept mentioning how young I was.  What if they found nothing. He didn't want to remove it in vain.
Well, my Mum and I left there flustered.  I called the Doctor's office after lunch and spoke to the nurse.  I told her I wanted to have the hysterectomy. I would like him to do it, if not I was going elsewhere.  She understood my reasoning and said she would call back. (May I mention that the Gynocologist Oncologists are limited here.  One I graduated high school with. How super awkward would THAT have been?) 
Today (Thursday) they returned my call. After speaking to my Oncologist, he has agreed to do the hysterectomy.  Friday I go in to sign the paperwork. Oh crap, I will probably have to do "the cleanse." again. Oh well, in case you are wondering my reasoning here is some of it:  
1.) It has to be glowing for a reason. Metabolically active is not good. Despite how much I kept telling      myself I have a "happy, shiny uterus."
2.) I would not want to pass this disease on to my hypothetical children.
3.) It's one less place for cancer to go, if it's not already there.
4.) No more periods. YEA!
5.) I would like to live longer so that I can have children...even if it is not the "old fashioned" way.
6.) This is a decision I am at peace with. I don't like having one additional thing to have to worry about.  Lung Cancer is enough.
7.) Did I mention no more periods? 
8.) There is no prayer of me EVER catching up with the Duggar Family.


I almost forgot. This week, I was supposed to go to Pittsburgh for an appointment and brochoscopy with my Lung Surgeon.  After all the craziness of the weekend, I decided to reschedule. 


So, may the hysteria begin. It's actually happening! More soon!


Much Love!
K*

Post Surgery blog- My life is so strange

In case you didn't hear, I still have my baby room. A.k.a. oven, womb, or uterus.
I contacted my doctors office Monday to see if I could just get it out. Due to insurance issues, we had to keep the surgery with a hysterectomy as needed.  My doctor got in there, did washes of my uterus and looked around via laproscope.  There wasn't anything to biopsy. He said everything looked fine including the organs around. I know he was initially concerned with my being in my child bearing years when discussing a hysterectomy. Of course my outlook was "one less organ to worry about with cancer."  The results from the tests they did should be back in 3-7 days.  So, maybe the anomaly of it all is I just have a happy, shiny uterus.  I may never know.  As long as it is NOT cancer, I am content. Also that I won't have to do a colonoscopy prep again anytime in the near future. Yeah, they made me do that to prep for this surgery. In case you have never had this cleansing experience, the preparation is the worst. You have been warned. 
So, without further ado, I give my favorite version of "Happy Shiny People" by REM. 

May the Lord Bless you and keep you!

Next procedure, Bronchoscopy on March 9.
Hope to see you soon!
Love
K*

This is my story about Control...

'ello! 


This is a story about control, my control
Control of what I say, control of what I do
And this time I'm gonna do it my way- Janet Jackson-Control

Tuesday, I'm having a hysterectomy.  Yep, that's right, I'm not going to be able to bear children.  AND I am OK with it.  Yes, it is heartbreaking but I deeply feel like I am doing the right thing.  1.)  I will not pass along cancer in my genes. 2.) I would rather not have one more thing to wonder about.  My uterus has been metabolically active for quite awhile.  Why risk having cancer in another place? 3.)  There is always adoption. 4.) The Duggars have more than made up for any addition I could have added to the world. Besides, I would never be able to catch up with them now without looking like octomom.

I also have to confess the feeling of being less feminine and less desirable have crossed my mind. However, I know I will always be beautiful in the eyes of the Lord.  My uterus and cancer do not define me or my femininity.  They only make me stronger!  My battle may be unique, but it is mine!  Am I a greeting card or what?

Shocking as this all is, it is ultimately my decision. I was originally going to have them take it if need be.  They were going to go in laproscopically, look around and remove it if need be.  I decided rather than have them go in without me totally aware of what was going on, I wanted to have that control over what was occurring.  That and I hate things being drawn out forever. I already have too much of that.  WAY too much! So, I will be admitted to Mon General for a few days. My bronchoscopy in Pittsburgh has been moved to March 9th.

The night before I went to the doctor, I was watching Dr Quinn. Shocking, I know. (Ok, I confess, I watch it up to four times a day. It is most definitely something I look forward to.)  Anyhow, they showed the episode "Best Friends" where Dorothy thinks she is pregnant but actually going through menopause.  Anyhow,  she winds up having a hysterectomy.  I have been having hot flashes. Funny how that show likes to foreshadow lil specs of my life..

I thought i would share my letter to my uterus:

Dear Uterus,

I know God created me to have you included initially. However, you are being evicted!  I never wanted to start what people call "becoming a woman."  You also have tortured me with this process for over 22 years.  You decided to make it even worse, when I entered my thirties.  BOO HISS to you, Uterus.  I can't deal with you and the mysterious lesions within your walls.  Metabolically active things that can be removed, will be. Somehow, I've always known no one would use you as a residence.  Despite the amount of times I said I was going to have triplets.  It just gives me the chance to make a difference in the life of a child who's parents can't handle the responsibility. 

I hope you understand!

In lighter news, I would like to share a few of my favorite youtube videos!  ENJOY

The first ones are starring Ms. Kristen Bell!

Sophia Grace and Rosie Show!

I hope life is treating you all well!  Some people collect tattoos. I collect scars.


Peace!
K*

ACK! My face is nudie!

So,  wow, it's been a long time since my last blog!  With the holidays, and January being full of appointments, it's been a blur!  PET Scans, Ultrasounds, new doctors and blood tests. Oh My!
As of January 31, I am no longer on oxygen therapy full time. My face feels so naked!  My new Pulmonary Specialist thinks I only need to be wearing it when exerting myself and at night.  I also had a sleep study done last night.  They are concerned that I may have sleep apnea.  My breathing is still labored when breathing through my mouth and I purr sometimes. Ok, maybe I snore a little. So many people do!  I should hear the results of the sleep study in about two weeks.
WARNING FELLAS!  Girl Talk! Read at your own risk!
My PET Scan found metabolic activity in my uterus. This was also found in a PET Scan in August.  I was well aware I had fibroids, but they usually are not metabolically active.  I got an ultrasound ( yeah, the one the doctor never tells you about HOW it is done.)  The gal seemed a lil concerned and it took longer than my last one I had done.  In the report, it mentioned how this could be leiomyosarcoma ( this is yet another rare cancer- CRAP!)  So, I wound up with yet another new doctor, a Gynocologist Oncologist after speaking to my Oncologist.  My nurse managed to get me an appointment that was this morning.  I am having a D & C and biopsies early February 7.  I am well aware of the consequences of what this all could mean. Most of my life I had hoped to have kids the "good ole fashioned way." Yet, in the back of my mind, I've always known that I would probably wind up adopting.  I rest in the Lord in whatever the outcome is.  Regardless, if this is leiomyosarcoma, I say, "Out with it!"  The sooner I have answers though the better!  These procedures are all being done here locally in Morgantown.
Ok, Fellas it's Safe to Read again!
 Meanwhile, I need to make an appointment to have my regular Bronchoscopy in Pittsburgh with my hottie surgical team.  Also, with all of these procedures and all, my maintenance Chemo is on hold.  Doctors don't like to perform surgery within two weeks of Chemo. 
The holidays went by so fast. I apologize for not updating you all sooner. Then again you know how to get ahold of me.  
Peace and Love to you all!
~K*

wow, it's really almost December?

Whoa! It's been over a month since my last post.  Sorry about that!

You are probably wondering how my bronchoscopy and lavage went.  It was outpatient surgery. I came out of surgery with just a sore throat for a few days. I have a lesion deep in my top lobe, possibly into the middle lobe. In case you aren't familiar with the anatomy of a lung, the right lung has three lobes, or chambers.  The left lung is smaller and only has two.  My left lung has taken on 75% of breathing. Normally the left would do 45% of the work. The right would do 55%.  I also have some irritation in the lower lobe. I still have pain in my lung. That's probably because cancer jacked it up.

I'm still a little torn about them not removing my lung. I mean,  if the lung is gone the cancer should be too. On the other hand, have I mentioned I hate chest tubes and tape? I really do! I am glad to have a team of doctors that have my best interest in mind. Dr Luketich and Dr Levy are my surgeons.  Here is Dr Mo,  my oncologist.  The picture doesn't do him justice.  He really has an amazing smile. If you press the links you can see how legit they are.  They are just three of the awesome people I am proud to have on my medical team. My nurses are all amazing too. They have always taken great care of me.  I'm blessed that they have all been brought into my life.  I am blessed!

My Nashville workplace walked in my honor at the Lungevity Breathe Deep Walk on November 5th. Over 20 people walked in my honor. I can't even begin to tell you how loved I felt to see the pictures of the event. I haven't seen them in over six months and they still took time out of their lives. Time to help raise money for research of the disease I will be fighting the rest of my life. I appreciate them so much. They also did a jean week in my honor. Awesome!  Big thanks to my coworkers! I'm getting teary just thinking about it.

My birthday came and went.  I had a nice day with my family! We went to the Texas Roadhouse for dinner!  YEE-haw! If you noticed above, I'm now a 35 year old that has lung cancer. It's hard to believe I'm that old!!  I still have lots of balloons flying around here!! Heck, yeah! Here are some pictures my lovely sister took from the evening!

 Oh No! The old empty card trick!

No worries! I got a gift card

Yee Haw!

My nephew Lukas, bro-in-law, Drew, Taylor, Morgan and me

                                                

My Mom, my sister, Kim and I

Lukas, Taylor, Morgan and me!

                                                                                                                                                                                                   

Kim and I  

Lukas, Charlie, Taylor, Morgan and I

                                                                        

This is the necklace Taylor made!     

Let's go Mohigans! from the ReVeals!

                                                                                         

Taylor made this card!   

Lukas, Dad, Taylor, Morgan and I

                                                                                              

My parents, my brother and I spent Thanksgiving with what I refer to as the Greek side of the family.  I am really referring to the neighbors that live behind my parents house. I wonder if this will become our new tradition!   Their youngest son, Chris, and I grew up together.  We are a little more than two months apart in age.  I used to understand Greek as a child thanks to Yia Yia Effie and Yia Yia Maria. I have so many childhood memories that include them. No wonder I've always considered them family.

Tuesday I went in for a CT Scan. I'm not sure when I will hear the results from that. This week, I begin maintenance chemotherapy. I will be receiving that every three weeks from now on.  My surgeons want to see me every 3-6 months.

Having to be dependent on others is so frustrating at this point. Heck, I haven't driven since APRIL! I'm working on this now. Hoping to take the wheel this week. I'm pretty sure it's like riding a bike.

Everyday its harder and harder to be away from these lil gals.

It's amazing how much time has passed.  I'm still on oxygen and waiting to see where this adventure will take me next.  I'm hoping to make a trip to Nashville soon.

Meanwhile, I saw "The Muppets" yesterday.  Loved it! I'll probably be seeing it more than once. I was pretty apprehensive about it at first.  However, they stayed true to Jim Henson's vision for those lovely Muppets. Did I mention I loved it?

I've started Christmas shopping, have you? 

Amazing!

I went to see my surgeons after getting another PET/CT scan on Thursday.  Well, everyone I received incredibly awesome and shocking news! The Senior Surgeon told me that removing part or all of my lung would be incredibly risky at this point.   That at this point the lung doesn't look like active disease. So, the major surgery is now been cancelled!  Instead, they are going to do a bronchoscopy and Bronchoalveolar lavage on November 1.  So,with that they will do some more biopsies and all.  This is an OUTPATIENT procedure and I should not have to worry about recovering afterward.  YAY! God is good. (All the time!) 
My parents and I sat there in shock as we were told this news. You have no idea how happy I am to not have to deal with all the chest tubes and tape again! Also my parents will not have to watch me suffer and my dad will not have to commute back and forth. SO Thankful!
The surgeons plan for me to have regularly scheduled bronchoscopies. I will be seeing my magnificent oncologist Dr M soon.  I believe, he plans for me to finish my cycle of chemo and possibly start my maintenance plan. 
Despite that, I still have some pain and am on oxygen all the time. My right lung will probably never be normal or function normally.


 I can't fathom the awesome power of God.  It blows my mind. I know that between the awesome power of God's healing and the prayers to him from everyone all over the world on my behalf has made has made all the difference.  Resting on sweet Jesus has made all the difference! I AM loved!





And whether you like it or not he loves you too! 


Love,
K*

P.S. I designed this and my friend Jennifer made it pretty! November is Lung Cancer awareness month! Wear a white ribbon or pearls to show support.

Left Lung: 75% Right Lung:25%

So that's the score right now! They also believe that the tumor is in the top lobe of my right lung which is only kicking in 4% of the breathing work right now.  Which is pretty awesome! Can I get an AMEN?

So, I have been out of the hospital for nine days. My next surgery is currently scheduled for November 1. This unfortunately means I can't make it to Nashville like i was hoping for the Lung cancer walk down there. Bummer! I was really looking forward to seeing my Nashy friends beautiful faces! I really miss you all BUNCHES!

I went to the Dr on Thursday. They originally wanted to do the next surgery this past Friday. Then, it was Monday and then Wednesday.  While we were in the appt. my surgeon spoke to the Senior Surgeon (who I still haven't met.) My surgeon spoke to him while he was in the room with us. He then stepped out for a moment. We aren't really sure what all was said, suddenly he thought I needed more time to heal. As I had a rough time recovering from surgery. He also thought that I should have another PET Scan.

It was very odd. We were going a more conservative route. I felt MUCH better about this. Despite all the downsides, (missing seeing Nashville in Nov and possibly being super sore on my Nov 15th bday) I am ready to have this tumor out of me.  They currently believe it to be a lil less that 2 centimeters big! Chemotherapy, the love, prayers and well Jesus have done immense healing.  I still have plenty to go but I have made huge strides.

Speaking of strides, (nice segway,eh) I can't believe all the people from my workplace who have stepped out to walk to fund Lung Cancer Research. I am so touched! I feel so loved and supported by you. You all are amazing! If you would like to donate to their team, or join them you can by going HERE  The walk in Nashy is Nov 5  in Centennial Park. 

For those in the Los Angeles area, my Woobie, Kristin and her family are walking in Manhattan Beach, Ca.  If you would like to walk or donate to the California Team KStar please go HERE

And finally the walk that is coming up quickly is for the American Lung Association here in Morgantown, WV. It is on October 22! If you would like to join me and my friends walking or donate, you can do that HERE

So enough pimping my cause.  Here are some drawings I did some shrinky dinks of:

Please note my"rotten potato"

Here's a song to move your soul

Much Love!

K*